I'll be wearing it in July, thank you very much

I started working on the warm hug (Suzy) last fall, and it hibernated during christmas knitting and didn't come back out until the i-cord gloves had trouble - they're a little too big. The problems just have kept coming on the damn thing, I am so frustrated. I would really like to finish this in time to wear it but spring is already right around the corner. I just know I'm going to finish late... or not at all. I don't really mind the knitting, because it's such a large gauge, but the yarn it starting to look a little tired and felted. Sissy Princess asked me what had gone wrong, so here is the hit list:

* I can't count. I'm not sure why I thought 38 stitches was 48, but voila, now I've ripped back to the armscye bindoff. It's probably okay though, because...

* I also can't tell how many stitches I bound off on one side, and I don't think it matches the other side. I have this strange method of binding off at the edge that makes a nice smooth line instead of a zagging line - it's a variation of a short row, really - but it completely prevents me from being able to determine what row I started my bind off on, and it even makes it hard to see how many stitches I've bound off. I don't know why I think I like it because this won't be the first time I've had to frog back to the decreases simply because I can't tell what the fuck I'm doing.

* I can't write. OK, actually I can, but later when a post-it falls out of my knitting bag with the number "56" on it, I have no idea what it's for. 56 rows? Bind off on the 56th stitch? My aunt's birthday?

* I still can't count. If I have 25 rows in the raglan sleeve decreases, then just maybe I should have 25 rows in the body as well. Front AND back? Well, now that's just crazy talk. Frog, frog, frog.

* I can't seam. How many times did I start the seam with some kind of bizarre, made up stitch instead of the one my mother taught me which I think is a mattress stitch? Let me count the ways... one.... two.... three... ah damn it!

* I can't measure. Sure, it looked fine when I held it up to myself. It even seemed okay when I pinned it together with stitch holders. And it is the same size as something sorta similar in my closet. But it wasn't. It pinches at the underarm and is a little too cropped. I like slightly cropped, but this is Sissy Princess annoying, way too short, cropped. A visit to the frog pond, anyone?

I've disassembled the freaking thing back to the armscyes, again. We are in very familiar territory here. I've confirmed the body length at this point, using TWO different methods - actual measurement (!!) as well as the gee, it was too short before, I should add about 4-5 rows method. I've double checked the row gauge they're using and since I'm whoppingly off on the rows, recalculated using my row gauge. I know, seems totally obvious, but usually the row gauge isn't that important - I've learned something new about raglans! I think it might be to never knit one again.

So now the plan is to triple check the row calculations, since I did them on the bus using the calculator on my phone and a piece of paper ripped out of a magazine and I'm just feeling like a spreadsheet might be a safer bet. I may even check my numbers against the Handy Book of Sweater Patterns. Stand Back!




For the fitting, I may have to go the extra mile. I've certainly had problems getting a good fit in a partially completed item before. Threads magazine has had a few articles on creating a mannikin / dress forms. Good dress forms are expensive, and ones you can change the size on are REALLY expensive, the idea was to have something cheap enough that if you changed weight, you could just create a new one. Since I'm currently wearing pants that would fit better were I to lose 10 pounds, and damn it, I'm on spark people every day, I like the idea of a body double that is cheap enough to chuck. Even if I don't lose the weight (sob!) I'll still need to get rid of it in a few months when The Big Trip (TBT) starts.